Dear Sickofit,

I am sorry to hear you are being boxed in by stereotypes. This sort of insensitivity is as old as the ages (at least, as old as I am!) I understand how disheartening it can be to feel that you are not being seen for your unique self and not being evaluated for everything you have to give.

As hard as it might seem, consider calmly addressing these misconceptions when they arise, emphasizing that your generation should be more understanding of diversity and tabling of assumptions until they know the person. Let them know how much stereotyping hurts you. Educating others can also help foster understanding and empathy.

Here are a few responses that might help:

a. I appreciate your absolute belief in my abilities, but there is no Asian “all A” gene. I study as hard as anyone else to get “A”s and I certainly don’t always get them. Let's challenge these assumptions together and embrace individuality.
b. While I strive for success, I'm human too and have ups and downs. Let's celebrate each other's differences and stop making assumptions that perpetrate envy and untruths.